Do you know how long I’ve had some version of this post in my drafts? Weeks, actually, probably more like months … A lot of times I find myself struggling to find the words to say exactly what I want to. Which is funny, considering my family is convinced I missed my calling and should be a writer. Each time they say it I cringe a little bit … because it just makes me wonder … am I missing my calling? Am I allowing my talent go to waste? Should I be working on that novel? Do I even have a novel in me? And … if writing isn’t my destiny … then what is?
I always think there is so much time … there’s always tomorrow, next week, next month, maybe in a year … well, time goes by so quickly and with one too many stops on the on the “I’ll start tomorrow” train I’m afraid I’m going to waste my entire life waiting for the next stop to pass … I do not know how to jump off …
Are some people just meant to live a mediocre life? With a mediocre job and living day to day doing mediocre things? Am I one of those mediocre people? Or is there some big & wonderful unknown hiding in the shadows of my being waiting for me to unleash? How the hell am I supposed to find out?
Do I just go on living day in and day out and just hope that one day my “ah-ha” moment slaps me in the face? Or am I supposed to be out there looking – not waiting for my destiny to find me but instead seek it myself?